I try to explain to Robert early on what food does to me. He doesn’t get it. I don’t really expect him to. He didn’t live the same life I did. While I was self soothing with another large pepperoni pizza he was probably going really fast on his sport bike to help clear his head and make him feel better. So when I got off the scale last night to find I only lost 3 pounds he asked “What can I do to help? We gotta start with only eating to take the hungry feeling away” I looked at him like he was crazy. I asked him “Have you met me? I can’t do that” He replied “yea yea you love food I know.”
“Have you met me? I can’t do that “
I can’t? I really just said that didn’t I? I definitely can, I obviously don’t want to! Why would I? It’s always been there before me. Before Robert ever was. Since my first heart break it was there to make me feel better. Through every, holiday, birthday celebration, funeral, car accident, motorcycle accident and every single break up, food has been there and always gave me comfort. Even when I was sad about how much weight I’ve gained! (Why stress causes people to overeat) But if I can quit smoking then I can do anything!
The struggle is real. For all you skinny b***hes that don’t understand why, it really is harder for some. We have to eat less and try even harder, be well rested, not let ourselves get to stressed (because then the cortisol kicks in and we all know how that one goes).
OK enough complaining and making excuses. TRY HARDER! One step at a time, but you have to do something if you want to see change! In order for me to move forward, I am going to take a few steps back. In my attempts to motivate myself (and others) I posted this 9 months ago:
There’s nothing like seeing how far you’ve come to keep you motivated. Take a snapshot of yourself when you’re just getting started, or where you are now, and take pictures of your progress along the way. It’s motivating when you see the positive changes in your body. Try tracking your progress by creating a weight loss diary via Instagram (or another similar photo app). Daily photos can document the changes in your body that you may not otherwise notice—and that the scale won’t always show. Motivation Tip # 3 – Create A Photo Diary
Then, as usual, I allowed everything else to take over and I stopped posting daily pictures on Instagram. Let’s dust ourselves off and try again!
I am going to leave you with the best advise anyone could have ever given me. It was by my old Tae Kwon Do instructor after several years of not training (and I am going to paraphrase it a bit)
“Do you know why you don’t have that great big job you want or why you are still driving around in that embarrassing car and why you gained weight and can’t seem to loose it? It’s because you keep making excuses and at the end of the day you are not where you want to be because you are simply not trying hard enough.”